A  DEATH  NOTIFICATION

     One of the things that officers and chaplains most dread is a death notification.  To knock on a strange person's door, often late at night, and announce that a loved one is dead (usually from an accident) is a difficult task.  There are several protocols that try to make the task as easy as possible.
     One of my first experiences in this process was not according to the protocol I had been trained in.  Dispatch asked me if I would accompany an officer on a death notification call, even though it was after midnight.  I agreed, dressed appropriately, and drove to the home.  I was surprised to see no patrol car.  I phoned the officer and found he had decided not to wait because of the late hour, and went to the home by himself.
     The circumstance was odd since it was a death notification of a suicide.  The death had occurred in a different city.  Someone had already notified the mother and some family had gathered despite the late hour.  The officer answered a few questions, and returned to his beat.
     I decided to also visit the home, knocked at the door and introduced myself, and after a while became the arbiter of a variety of suggestions and opinions that were in conflict with one another.  Concerns ranged from the nature of the suicide to its inevitability to who would do what next to whether a funeral would be held to whether it was for the best that the mentally ill deceased had killed himself!
     I focused on the needs of the mother of the deceased, but realized that I was not going to be able to resolve some long-standing family disagreements.  I eventually left around 4.30 am and returned home.  I later learned the suicide had killed himself after murdering another person.  I never heard again from the family